Ephemeral Sunshine Instead

Hey!

These past 3 months went hard, annoying, exhausting, and confusing. I couldn't get my own longing, my own thoughts, my own feeling, even my own deeds. Things were going too fast i guess so my brain couldn't catch it as fast as it comes.
The bomb has already blown up right at the 10th seconds not at 0 as it used to be. I ain't prepared that much so yeah i kinda messed up.
Keep blaming all this universe why this has to be happened again on me and why i have to drink the same tears like i've done it before.
And still believing that things would be fine like it used to when the fact everything has been wrecked into pieces.
So then i found myself laughing to me.
For being that stupid and being such a pathetic girl, a whore, and a loser.
Hahaha!

and it hits me that i think Summer was right
"Love is just a fantasy"

It's enough for me to see that all these people are just the same.
So i am stop doing this thing. i am exhausted
i really need a rest, God.
These wounds are really more than enough.
Seriously.
I'm done and it was really great! Yes I mean it! so please stop.

Funny isn't it to see and experiencing  your favorite movie is rolling in your own life?
Hey Tom i know that feel!

xo,
T